CATHOLIC CHRISTIANS AND CHURCH

The feeling of church growing up in Italy

 

Living in a small village of 500 people, there is not the chance to compare different culture, religion, ethnicity or anything different of what we are. Unlike now, at the time I have grown up, in the eighties, there was no many people immigrated from other countries, even in the bigger village close to mine and so, all we knew was about our culture and ethnicity. Everybody was Catholic and everybody believes at everything about church -understood as the Vatican and all orders below -. Church has been always the biggest thing for the community, so big that in the past, some people left everything they owned to church (houses, money, property, etc…) before to die.

When I was a kid, I never had any doubt about religion and the church, I was baptized, I made my first communion and then, even if I was not anymore so sure of what I was doing, I get my confirmation too. Of course I had no choice to get baptized. At first communion, maybe I could be able to think and have some doubt about what I was doing, but for any kid was something normal and everyone was happy to do it; we felt it was a good step in our life. I did my confirmation too, at the time I was 12 years old and I was going to school in a different village, with many other guys and for the first time I heard somebody say they were atheists and they were not having the confirmation, finally something different.

Growing up I started to have some questions, I started to do not accept when a church ask our money while they are so rich. I started to watch the Vatican, all that gold they have, all those fat people that stay there, telling us to pray and give them money. I didn’t like when every year we have to pay taxes, and if we don’t choice in the proper paper we have to fill a different destination, 5 per 1000 of the money go straight to the Vatican bank. Vatican is not even part of Italy, but somehow they have been able to make this option in a way that, in past, most of the people doesn’t even knew that we have that clause, and where that clause’s money go if we don’t choice different destination.

Once again, I was connecting the money they have, and the nothing they do for the big problems in the world, starting from the poorer countries where people have no food and water, to the countries they fight civil wars, all what they say is to pray, but starving people doesn’t feel better with our prayer. I respect all the missionary people that stay in poor, helping the others, but as we have a few people from the area where I live that choose this life, I know that all the money they have, comes from the charity we normal people do and no much, or maybe nothing from the rich church. I started to hate fake system of good people only while talking, staying behind the image of God.

The time goes and we always learn from life or from meeting people. What I learned about church was going to improve my hate to them. Finally I realized that the Church own a good part of Italy. Considering what they have in my small village, at least 10 houses and other property, is all related all around the country; in my province, they own castles, most of the vinery and most of the fruit farms. They own palaces in the city and they rule much of the economy. That is shocking. Once again, I started to wonder how it is possible. How they can have so much, ask again money, tell us to pray and do charity to them, but then they don’t do anything else than pray (maybe). It makes me really angry.

I’m not the only person who hates the Vatican and this church system. In the last years, many things has been exposed and many people understood many things that have been kept hidden as long as they could. Everybody now know about the huge quantity of money they have, also everybody now know that the church own so many property. Still most of the people don’t care at what the Vatican does, and because the strong faith in god they have, they probably don’t want even to see how deep is the dark side of the church. Even when talking about the evidence, many people don’t want to see. There are no more blind people as those who don’t want to see.

Sometimes I talk about when the “smiling” pope Luciani has been killed. Pope Albino Luciani was called Pope John Paul l, he was found dead in September 1978 in his bed after 33 days he was proclaimed pope. I hear people say “he has been killed because he wanted to clean the Vatican from the evil”, but they still believe in the Vatican. I cannot understand. Some people tell me that the pope has been killed from inside the Vatican, but those people still believe in the Vatican, why? One time has been told me that the Vatican is the church, and the church is everybody who believe in god.

The stories behind the Vatican are many. There are even conspiracy theorists that beliefs about big power people rule the Vatican from many years ago and so for some generations too; or that Vatican vertices people are part of freemasonry. Anyway, what is clear for me is that they are not what they want us to believe they are.

The church has shaped the way I probably live in the opposite way usually does with common people making me think a lot, till don’t even believe anymore in god too. I don’t say anything critical about god or catholic believes. I don’t make any difference to any people with different believes. Also to get out of church in this way, I started to look to anybody without any difference at all, like religion, ethnicity or race, for me we are all the same. I felt kind of free, at least about what to think and what to believe.

My point of view is pretty exposed by facts and we can find material everywhere online. Even in school history books, at least in Italy, is always written that the church wasn’t the exactly reflex of what god teach in the bible, in fact, till hundred years ago, church killed people in name of god. Because this feeling of made a fool of me situation, I really went deeper than what I probably can write here about many topics.

This situation shapes the way I live, because I understood that is so easy to lie at so many people if you can make them believe what they like, and want to believe. Falling out with the church changed my life view. Before, when I was a kid, I had not many doubts about anything, but after understanding how the church works, I questioned myself even about anything has not logic equality humanity. I questioned myself about politic, economy, why countries are still poor and why we still have wars and so forth.

This situation shapes the way I live, because I understood that is so easy to lie at so many people if you can make them believe what they like, and want to believe. Falling out with the church changed my life view. Before, when I was a kid, I had not many doubts about anything, but after understanding how the church works, I questioned myself even about anything has not logic equality humanity. I questioned myself about politic, economy, why countries are still poor and why we still have wars and so forth.

I started to have many questions in my life, and I started to find the answers. The problem to answer to some questions, is that for one question I can answer, I have 10 more new questions, so when I understand something, is becoming just crazy because then I need to understand much, much more. Another problem is that the answer to such unusual questions, are too difficult to accept for many people.

Truth is not easy to believe, and most, when we discovered that we past all life to believe in what is not true, is really difficult to accept. Truth is truth even when people think is false, and false is false, even if people think is truth. I need to say that I have no the absolute truth in myself, I could seem a bit arrogant in the way I’m talking, but after my changes of believing about the church I understood few more things that changed my life and the way I’m living.

When for example, I talk with friends about some answer I got, they don’t want to believe even if I expose the facts in a way nobody can’t contradict.

I think my critical spirit improved a lot from what I learned about church. Now I find difficult to believe in what the media or important people say. I understood that who has the power is able to shape people as they want. I understood that I can be able to think and be critical to many topics that normal people here don’t even understand why I should question it.

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albertino82a

" He doesn't like any simple things, challenges are part of his life! Alberto is an Italian Web Designer, graduated from a US college. Now is facing one more time a new working world, getting into the Web Design development. Started to travel when he was young, he loved the differences around the globe! He also has been living in a few countries so far, Australia, USA, Poland, Malta and now the Czech Republic, enjoying the different culture and lifestyles. Passionate of course in travelling, in photography, in old soft rock music, and good food, especially if Italian! Yeah for me, still the best food in the world! "

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